The USA Olympic Roster: Are You Kidding Me!?

We keep hoping that January 1^st will be revealed as a second “April Fools” type day of the year. Why? Because that would mean the USA Olympic roster would be one big joke. Oh wait, it already is. Are you kidding me with this roster? Yes, our national team does not have the star studded talent that the Canadians have, but come one. My neighbour’s brother’s niece’s best friend’s little sister could have picked a better roster than this. And she’s 7 years old.

Let’s starts off with the obvious. Erik Johnson has been left off of the roster. Now, he isn’t the best American defenseman in the world, that’s no secret. But I’ll tell you what. He is better than Cam Fowler, Brooks Orpik, Paul Martin, and Justin Faulk. That is 4 guys picked ahead of EJ that he is better, or at least, equal with in skill.

Let’s continue talking about the defense. Justin Faulk is a 21 year old kid on Carolina who is part of a terrible defensive corps. And he gets the call over Jack Johnson. Johnson is an outstanding defenseman who has proven himself on the international stage 10 time. TEN times!

Then there’s this guy, you may have heard of him, Keith Yandle. The second best American defenseman in the world. He was left off the roster because he was said to be a defensive liability. Because Cam Fowler isn’t? Fowler is and offensive d-man, with defensive liabilities as well. So, dear reader, if you had a choice of who to sign to the Avs, Yandle or Fowler, who would you choose? Yandle? Yea, we know.

Onto the forwards. And we’re going to sum this up in one sentence. Max Pacioretty, Blake Wheeler, and Ryan Callahan ON the team: Jason Pomminville, Kyle Okposo, and Bobby Ryan OFF the team. Callahan is the most deserving of the three, but how can you justify leaving Ryan, Okposo (2^nd place in points among American NHLers) and Pomminville? Oh, because Ryan isn’t fast enough and Pomminville and Okposo won’t do well on the big ice. Well then good thing you picked the “speedy” Joe Pavelski and the explosive David Backes.

We could go on for pages and pages over the horrible choices an shocking snubs on the USA roster, but we won’t. Just prepare yourself for no medals and an absolute barrage of shots. The only thing these guys got right was the goalies. Good luck Pacioretty. Score some goals on the 4^th line Wheeler. Try not to be undressed TOO much Orpik and Martin. And when the United States are eliminated from medal contention by the Swiss or Czechs, laugh until you pull an oblique muscle Ryan, Johnson, Johnson, Okposo, and Yandle.